A Love Like No Other
by Lovin' Big Time Rush
Summary: Knights were supposed to be gallant, proud, and chivalrous. So then why has Kendall Knight, known for his courage and strength, become so weak and insecure about his relationship with his true love, Logan Mitchell?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This is a project between ImprecantesStellam and myself, Lovin' Big Time Rush. We hope you enjoy it and give us feedback!** __

_**S****o I know this is ImprecantesStellam's A/N because they wrote this chapter, but since it is on my account, I have to hack it. Its for a good reason though! So I know personally I hate reading a chapter story and waiting for the next chapter, so if you guys do then guess what! There's this story where you don't have to wit, because it is already finished! Well there's a sequel...but the first ones finished! Lol. After you read this and review, you should go check it out! It's called Haunted and it's by the one and only ImprecantesStellam! It's a wonderful story and i fell in love with, and i just know you guys will too! So go check it out, and shhhh i wasn't here ;).**_

It had been twenty-nine weeks; two-hundred and five days; four-thousand, nine-hundred and twenty hours; He could remember the exact date he asked him to stay with him forever and portray their love around the world. It had been that long since he had accepted, and opened the pathway to a portal of peace, prosperity, and passion. Yet, it was not a pathway that was smooth. There were pebbled turned here and there, and sometimes he saw cracks on the stone-padded walkway. He always did his best to stir the duo from even touching those cracks, but it was sometimes inevitable. However, it was no longer the physical pain he felt that hurt him the most. It was no longer the physical actions of touching the crack on the pathway. It was the fact that he caused it.

He was the one who was suspicious. He was the doubtful one. He was the ambiguous one. He was the indecisive one. It was almost magical what being around him did. He shifted from the fierce, protective leader to the obscure enigma. Only he could do that to him. It was so spellbinding how he did that to him. And to further emphasize the magical aspects of their loving relationship, it impressed him to see that he changed as well. He became the self-assured, confident one, always helping him along. He was the one who calmed him down. He protected him, whenever they were alone. It was truly breathtaking to see so much magical love in the air.

He had been told ninety-seven times that he was loved by him. It was something that always made him fill up with excitement and butterflies. Even when it was meant as a form of expression for finding his medical book, or making him a cup of coffee as they ran out to meet the neurotic Gustavo for rehearsal, it always gave him this feeling of joy, exhilaration. It made him feel as if he was empowered enough to run a marathon. It made him feel as if he could take on the world. Those three words were a magical incantation for some ancient magic that Kendall knew nothing of, but only basked in its spiritual effects.

While it made him feel powerful, it also made him feel weak. It made his knees buckle. It made him flutter in weakness. It made him feel that it was not genuine. It made him feel that it was not true. It made him feel that it was forced and a lie. It was this voice in the back of his head, that whispered silently like a cutthroat whispering the last words to his prey. He hated the feeling, but it was always there. It was this pervading presence that perverted his perfect passionate pertinence with the band's genius.

He, Kendall Donald Knight, was hopelessly in love with Hortense Logan Philip Mitchell. Every beat of his heart was in Logan's name, and every breath he breathed was for the shorter boy. However, each tear he shed alone at night was in Logan's name. Every time he doubted his perfect relationship with the boy, he could not take it. He wanted to believe each word Logan said to him. He wanted to live in that vision Logan had for both of them. He wanted to know that Logan truly would be there for him.

Kendall Knight could take on the world. True to his surname, he would gallantly fight on the front line to protect those he loved, and practice chivalry with his beloved. He could shine to the world in his armor. Yet, his source of power was his biggest weakness. It killed him to even see a flicker of doubt paint itself across Logan's face. Logan claimed it was never there, and Kendall would act coaxed, but the nagging voice inside his head always proved otherwise.

James Diamond and Carlos Garcia, the two best friends of Kendall and Logan, accepted the relationship jubilantly. One of Kendall's initial concerns was not that he would be ostracized with his brothers, but that Logan would. Kendall never wanted to see even a small paper-cut from flipping the massive biology book Logan tugged around. It was as if Kendall was an artist, and Logan was his masterpiece. However, Kendall was not the compulsive or possessive type. He knew that Logan was going to be there for him, even if the voice inside his head made him doubt it.

Kendall was never a perfectionist. That title belonged to Logan. However, he wanted his relationship with Logan to be perfect. He wanted them to be the lovers that functioned truly as two bodies, but one soul. He wanted them to be the lovers that still played romantic pranks on each other despite being in a nursing home. He wanted them to be the lovers that could go out in public and hold hands.

Of course, the last desire was a bit too incredulous for Kendall's current situation. Kendall, Logan, James, and Carlos were the foursome that was Big Time Rush. They had conquered over the evil that was the production company, and finally were reaping what they sew. They had won many hearts from teenage girls around the world, and especially by the fan-mail they received, it was no secret that Big Time Rush was popular. Small countries, like Kerplankistan, fawned over the boys. They had their own unique spin that brought them ahead of other past boy-bands, like Boy Quake. The sad reality was that, while it was already an anxious moment upon coming out to Mrs. Knight, Katie, James, and Carlos, the process of repeating that action for Gustavo, Kelly, and Griffin was far more ominous. Kelly would be able to handle it, but Kendall could see the tears coming down Logan's face when Gustavo would yell at them and when Griffin would imminently try and break them apart for his company.

Kendall Donald Knight desired, cherished, wanted, and loved Hortense Logan Philip Mitchell. Yet, the only thing keeping them from reaching the zenith of their love...was Kendall himself.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Hey guys. So here's the next chapter of ImprecantesStellam and my story :). I hope you enjoy, and please review! **

**I know ImprecantesStellam has already talked to you guys, but I would still like to give a big thanks to: Love and Peace Forever and OptimisticallyHeartbroken for your awesome reviews. Also a thanks to everyone who have alerted/favorited (is that a word? lol) this story! :D  
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Logan sat on the side of my bed and slowly shook my shoulder. "Wake up." He whispered in my ear. I groaned. Yeah I was already awake, but I just didn't want to get up! I just wanted him to lay back down so I could wrap my arms around him…

"Kendy, wake up." He sing-songed. I groaned slowly opening my eyes. Day two-hundred and six. It seemed almost unreal. Only one-hundred and fifty-nine days until our one year anniversary. If you make it that long. There goes that doubt. Always putting Logan and my relationship down…

"Hey babe." Logan smiled and kissed my forehead.

"Hey…" my voice trailed off. After all this time I still hadn't figured out a nickname for him. I can't call him babe, that's what he calls me. I can't call him baby, that's the long version of what he calls me. Sweetheart? What if he doesn't like being called that? Cupcake? No, that's too feminine. Pumpkin? No, I hate pumpkins…

"What's wrong?" he asked giving me a concerned look. I shook my head before pulling him into a deep kiss. My head started to spin like it always does when we kiss. He pulled back first. I hate when he pulls back first, it always makes me feel like i did something wrong. "Kendall, seriously, please tell me what's the matter." he pleaded, his chocolate brown eyes bore into my soul trying to figure out my problem.

"I don't have a nickname for you." I whispered my cheeks burning in embarrassment. He chuckled lightly, and I gave him a dirty look. He quickly stopped laughing and cleared his throat. He settled down next to me on the bed and wrapped his arms around my torso. He pulled me close to him before he replied.

"What about Logie? You always use to call me Logie." he purred as he brushed our noses together in an Eskimo kiss. I smile up at him.

"Okay. Good morning, Logie. I love you." he smiled down at me and pecked me on the lips.

"Good morning. I love you too, babe." i pull him in for another passionate kiss. He only played along for a few minutes though, before he pulled away again. I can tell he can see the annoyance on my face, because he unwrapped his arms from around me and got up.

"Wait-" I called but he just walks out of the room. I sigh as I get up and throw on some pants and a raggedy T-shirt. I follow him into the living room where I find him already engrossed in a medical book. I sit on the couch next to him and sigh. He doesn't look up, so I sigh louder. After the fourth sigh, he looks up and glares at me.

"Why did you stop kissing me?" I'm surprised at how small my voice sounds. When it comes to Logan, I could be extremely insecure.

"Because you needed to get up." his answer is simple and as soon as he says it he returns back to his book. Everyone knows that I'm the 'man' in the relationship, but sometimes I can't help but think that's untrue. Whenever I think about it my blood starts to boil and I start to get mad. I'm supposed to be the man. Logan is supposed to count on me, I'm supposed to reassure him, I'm supposed to protect him, not the other way around.

I always seemed to feel as if Logan was holding something back. Whether it was the seemingly simple action of breaking a passionate kiss, or the increasingly complex rules of displaying affection in public, I always felt that Logan was not into the relationship. While I would want to feel mad because I felt that I was putting in my entire heart and soul into the relationship, I knew it was my fault. It was my insecurities and my own doubt that continuously cracks the once fortified wall of our relationship. Lately, I've begun to feel as if Logan has given up on repairing these cracks, and is simply waiting for the wall to break. I feel my blood boil again about it, but then my incessant mind begins screeching its shrill voice.

_"He doesn't love you,_" my mind screams, _"He feels bad for you."_ My mind continued to feed me these burnt crisps of lies, but for some reason, I kept on eating them. I could not tell my mind no, because part of me felt as if it was true.

"Are you mad at me?" I suddenly mumbled. I felt even worse for doing that. I was the man of the relationship, yet it was always Logan catching me. I was always the damsel in distress whenever it came to my mind, and Logan was my knight. Why was it like this? It should have been the other way around. Not that I would want to see Logan in pain, but I was supposed to be his knight!

Logan took a sharp inhale, before gently placing his book onto his lap, albeit keeping his finger on the page he was reading.

"Babe, I'm not mad at you," He sighed again, although I was beginning to feel my mind screaming again. It was telling me that my darkest thoughts were true. Before Logan could continue, I immediately got up, my blood boiling.

"Yes you are! You paused!" I roared, not caring if anyone heard us. Logan immediately blanched, and his eyes pleaded for me to silence, or at the very least, lower my voice. However, I would do no such thing.

"You're being ridiculous" Logan took another deep breath, shaking his head slightly. To my utmost horror, he appeared unfazed, despite looking back worriedly at where everyone else slept. After giving me a sympathetic look, he turned back to his medical book and began to scan the words in the tome.

I could not take anymore of this. Why was Logan acting like this? I must have done something wrong. It was always my fault. He always made me feel insignificant and childish, as if he was the mature one in our relationship. But I was supposed to be the one in charge, dammit, and he could not treat me in this way!

I then thrust the book out of his hands, which landed roughly onto the ground. Immediately, Logan stood up, despite being shorter than me, and his nostrils flared with frustration.

"Kendall, you're acting like a-" Logan began, his eyes appearing as if they were about to chastise me for another fault I committed. However, I never game him the chance to do so.

"A child? A baboon? An idiot?" I finished, tears threatening to emerge through my eyes. I could not take this anymore. Logan's face contained a flicker of hurt, but I was too far to stop. I could not stop, even if I wanted to stop. I suddenly opened my mouth, with the intent on saying everything I had been storing within myself for two-hundred and six days; everything I had bottled up inside of me. Today, Logan Mitchell would hear what I needed to say, whether he liked it or not.

**A/N: Okay the chapters over, you should review now :P**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: So I was going to update all my stories on Friday as a birthday present from me to you guys, but I realized I won't have time. I also realized it would be cruel to you guys to get like five emails in a day. So I am going to try**** and update them all this week. I know I'm updating two today :). So happy early birthday Logan, here's an update on a Kogan fanfic. Happy early birthday to me, here's an update on my favorite pairing :D. I would like to say a BIG thank you to the co-writer and ever amazing ImprecantesStellam. What a wonderful chapter if I do say. (I didn't proof read so sorry for any mistakes...) Also a thank you to: Love and Peace Forever, OptimisticallyHeartbroken, and Cryss'BTRusher for your fantastic reviews, Thank you to all who Favorited/Alerted!**

_I then thrust the book out of his hands, which landed roughly onto the ground. Immediately, Logan stood up, despite being shorter than me, and his nostrils flared with frustration._

_"Kendall, you're acting like a-" Logan began, his eyes appearing as if they were about to chastise me for another fault I committed. However, I never game him the chance to do so._

"A child? A baboon? An idiot?" I finished, tears threatening to emerge through my eyes. I could not take this anymore. Logan's face contained a flicker of hurt, but I was too far to stop. I could not stop, even if I wanted to stop. I suddenly opened my mouth, with the intent on saying everything I had been storing within myself for two-hundred and six days; everything I had bottled up inside of me. Today, Logan Mitchell would hear what I needed to say, whether he liked it or not.

I stood, my eyes burning with frustration and anger. It was as if my entire body throttled in anger and anguish, the two emotions swirling inside of me.

"Logan, you never take me seriously," I suddenly began. For the first time in my life, my horse was leading me; I was no longer leading it. I had no idea where this path would lead me, but I only hoped I could trust my instincts. "You treat me like I'm some subject of your sick experiment!" I yelled. I could hear impending footsteps rushing, but I had no longer any control.

I could see a flash of plain flicker across his beautiful face, but any ability I had to stop was gone. I could not stop, not at this moment.

"Some days, you love me. You stare at me with this gaze that makes me feel as if I'm the most important man in the world. Then, other days, you simply entertain me like a child, and act as if I am too dumb to understanding anything-LET ME FINISH." I bellowed, as I saw Logan attempt to bring a word into the conversation. I would not let him. My mind was telling me for once that everything I was doing was correct.

Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed four worried faces. Carlos stood, his eyes widened and his lips quivering. James had dropped his jaw, and was blinking, seeming as if he was expecting the situation to be a dream. My mother, and my lovable baby sister also stood, but their faces were so feminine and pure, I could not trust myself to read them accurately.

"Why do you do this to me Logan? Why do you make me feel so important one day, and then drop me down from my pedestal the other day?" I croaked, tears rushing to my eyes now. Logan's tears had made beautiful marks across his face, and his scrunched up avatar somehow, instead of dousing the fire inside of me, only fed it.

"Why dammit!" I roared, suddenly annoyed by the silence pervading the room. Logan needed to answer my question now!

Logan huffed and pushed his way past me, where I was currently blocking the doorway. "Get out of my way Knight!" he hissed as I tried to pull him back. I ceased my movement for a second. Logan never called someone by their last name. He growled menacingly, trying to pull his hand away from my loosened grasp. "I'm not just going to stand here at let you fucking yell at me!" Logan yelled his eyes flashing with anger. My own jaw silently dropped. Logan only cussed when he was extremely pissed.

I heard someone clear their throat. Logan and I quickly turned to them, remembering that we were not alone.

"Sorry Mrs. Knight." I heard Logan mutter before he swiftly walked to our room. I silently cursed myself for begging James to switch rooms with me when Logan and I had first started dating. Speaking of James... I turned to the four people still in the room.

The first face I noticed is the stern one of my mother. I could see the disappointment etched onto her face and concern shaded in her eyes. She opens her mouth to say something, but instead she closes it and ushers Katie out of the room.

I only got a glimpse of Katie's face before she was forced to leave, but what I saw was support. Complete support for her big brother.

I find similar support on James is face. He nodded to me before also leaving. Carlos' face, however, holds a different story. He looked pretty angry, his normal caramel skin was tinted pink. Like my mother, he looked like he wanted to say something, but instead he stormed away from me. I sighed and walked over to the couch and flopped down onto it. Maybe one day I could get over the all too famous Knight anger. Just maybe...

_Five-year-old Kendall and five-year-old Logan were laying on the grass in Kendalls back yard. They were looking up at the clouds just enjoying the warm summer sun._

_"Hey Logie." Kendall squeaked in his high little voice._

_"Hmm?" Logan mumbled back._

_"Have you ever kissed anybody?" the blonde asked._

_"Ew no! That's gross!" Logan exclaimed shaking his head and sticking his tongue out._

_"No its not! Its ramantic!" Kendall cried sitting up. Logan sat up as well and furrowed his eyebrows._

_"One: yes it is, and two: i think you mean romantic." Logan corrected him. Kendall just rolled his eyes. Logan might only be in Kindergarten, but he was already brilliant._

_"Whatever. I just think kissing will feel really good." Kendall smiled contently looking back up at the sky._

_"You think too much Kendall.," the smart boy said scrunching up his nose._

_"You say I think too much, but you're the gene-e-us." Kendall pointed out._

_"Its genius, smart one." Logan giggled. Kendall pouted and crossed his arms over his chest. Logan laughed some more and Kendall lightly pushed him. The smart boy fell back onto the ground._

_"Kendall!" he squealed as Kendall jumped on top of him and started to tickle him._

_"What Logie? Are you trying to say something?" Kendall asked tickling the boy underneath him some more._

_"Y-y-es! K-k-k-kendall s-s-stop-p!" Logan cried between laughs._

_"Okay, only if you kiss me." Kendall smile mischief evident in his eyes._

_"No Kendall! I told you that's gross!" Logan screeched trying to push Kendall off of him._

_"Please Logie." Kendall begged. He stuck out his bottom lip and looked at Logan through his eye lashes. Logan huffed._

_"Fine Kendall, but you better get off me when its over." Logan groaned before closing his eyes. Kendall quickly nodded his head before he leaned down and pressed his lips to Logans._

_Inside the Knights house, Mrs. Knight and Mrs. Mitchell were jumping around squealing. They were so happy at what they were witnessing. From the moment Kendall and Logan had met they had been connected at the hip. Mrs. Knight and Mrs. Mitchell knew from the moment the boys met that they would be the best friends that eventually fell in love with each other. They knew that this kiss meant nothing, but they could only hope it was the first in many._

_Kendall pulled away from Logans lips and looked down at the boy. They looked into each others eyes for a few minutes. Kendall had obviously felt something. It had felt like a little fire when their lips had touched, and it made Kendall want more. Logan caught Kendall off guard by pushing him off._

_"Well Kendall, it looks like now your going to have to CATCH ME!" Logan yelled as he took off running._

_"Oh you're going to have to run faster than that Logie!" Kendall yelled back as he jumped up and started running after the boy..._

I slowly woke up and groaned. I didn't want to wake up. That was one of my favorite memories. It was before all this shit started happening. It was weird though, because I could see myself. It was like I was watching it, not living it. It really put everything that happened today into perspective…

**A/N: So was it good enough to review on? **


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